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1. |
wreck
02:10
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another wreckingball playing god
the buildings tumble down
and the bricks crumble and return
to where they were once found
too fast
too slow
too forward
too awkward
im not what i want to be
im not what you want me to be
(know nothing
say something)
reluctant like a first kiss
haunted as is
im not anything as you
expected and i hope
thats fine
another wreckingball playing god
another wreckingball playing god
im not want i want to be
im not want you want me to be
another wreckingball playing god
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2. |
roses
02:05
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im mortgaged to the thought
that ive lost something
im paying off the bills to the
idea that it was never lost
i loved you more when i was soberless
i loved you more when i hated myself
i loved you when you loved you
and i loved you when i couldn't figure it out
(i loved you more when i couldn't figure it out)
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3. |
keeper
01:41
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I should've figured it out
what to say, what to do
I shouldn't have said that
but whats already out
cant be brought back in
my silhouette casts its shadow
down the steps of your apartment
my actions are paid for by credit
i hope the payments dont catch wind
i hope the payments dont catch wind
Choose to heal
Choose to appeal
Choose to feel
Choose to conceal
do what you want
and do what you must
but im left alive
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4. |
asterisk
01:56
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asterisk finish
to the relationship
Is it something
I would grieve?
let me pretend
I'm at least losing
something
everyday haunted
a living moving memory
is this against me?
so much in so little time
was it me? or was it we?
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5. |
tick
01:59
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I've lied to everyone I've ever loved
I've lied to everyone right from the start
so it wouldn't hurt later on
when they leave
There is a ticking time bomb
In every friendship I've ever had
Waiting to go off
at the worst moment
I've lied to every lover I've ever had
So they'd never take me back
I'm self destructive in the worst ways
& when I'm all alone in my apartment
I'll have no one but myself
Who's soon out the door
a ticking time bomb
bound to go off
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6. |
athena
01:33
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passed out on the lawn
in an arrangement of
cigarette butts
the sun gracing skin
i hope dont get
the call one day
that you're gone
the familiar becomes
dissonant as i grow
further away from you
the phone lights up
the phone lights up
the phone lights up
the phone lights up
apollo's arrow
striking through
the heart
i feel like the knife
in turnus's chest
slackened, my spirit
flees into death's gloom
swallowed whole
by the feeling
athena's words hammered
right through my jawline
the phone lights up
and you're gone
the phone lights up
and you're gone
the phone lights up
and you're forgot
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7. |
cherry
01:11
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some people can live
their whole lives
without living a single day
weigh up the worth
and what do you get?
in the cathedral
sequenced secrets
found in the leaflet
upon the steeple
where god is legal
and you're on the jury
your beauty is
a rotted cherry
mine is a
horribly written
obituary
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8. |
oxy
02:44
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i cant stay long
i have to be gone
oxycodone
dripping blood
down the staircase
my body's a noose
for my head
-
ive been waiting
for this moment to arrive
ive been waiting
for you to come to my life
ive been sitting
on my side to sleep
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9. |
family
01:03
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you abandoned me
it feels like shit
to know that family
doesnt have to
love you back
feels like shit
feels like shit
feels like distance
that i didnt really want
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10. |
hours
02:57
|
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how have i loved you so many times
and known your face was never in its place?
now i wasted so many hours here
now i waste so much time living here
and how was i so close to you?
have i found myself tucked away in your ear?
-
(there was once a note where im writing now. I no longer stand by it.)
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11. |
father
02:45
|
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thank god you never saw me grow up
id like to think you'd be ashamed
you've never known the person ive become
and I think that's good enough
and i hope you're well
wherever you are
you died with the memory
of what coulds and has not's
would you bother to call me your son?
did i know you to the extent i wish i could?
the world you raised me in
no longer exists
how am i suppose
to cope with this?
and I hope you're well
whenever, wherever you are
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12. |
birds
07:25
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(the birds)
i'll leave your head
by the door step
so you can watch
the pretty birds
passing on by
do you wish you were one?
do you wish you could
go wherever you want?
it doesnt feel right
a blue shadow
casting over everything
you ever loved
i know karma's comes to
collect it's fine
(the nest)
pull a line, carry a debt
you'll pay on time
always forgetting your life
pull, push, and shove
you'll be paying the interest
to the idea of people
you've never loved
(the tree)
the ennui within
settles for the languor of living
and places a bet for engaged
knowing well the existential
calamity of being bears its weigh
at every ounce of air
and at every pound of gravity
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Policeman Planet Records Arlington, Texas
home of jack willoughby muirhead & friends
PPR Usage License, Site Guide, Artist Guide, & Label Lore: docs.google.com/document/d/1X-Z_IjL2nP-tmdx0awBiaJf4PyebIKyHggkfi9-VQaU/edit?usp=sharing
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